Peer Problems?

Why do some children have problems making and keeping friends?
Children at risk for peer problems are typically either shy and withdrawn or loud and aggressive. They may under or overreact to others because of their basic personality style, or because they have a tendency to be anxious, moody, or impulsive. Children with language delays, attention, and learning problems are particularly at risk because they more often miss or misinterpret social cues and lack specific social skills.

How can parents and teachers help?
Children with peer problems need coaching and support to learn new skills, become more self aware, effectively communicate feelings, and solve problems. Adults can serve as good role models and give step-by-step advice and a lot of positive reinforcement for appropriate behavior.

When should a child be referred to a therapist for help?
When a child continues to be socially isolated or socially rejected and parents have been unsuccessful in their attempts to help, a child needs to see a specialist. Therapists trained in this area can conduct an assessment to determine specific skill deficits and determine if other evaluations are needed to rule out attention and learning problems, language and motor delays, and mood and anxiety disorders.

What is the most effective treatment for social skills problems?
Group therapy is needed to teach children specific skills and give them real-life opportunities to play and interact successfully with other children. Therapists use techniques such as direct teaching, role modeling, role play, real play, and feedback to teach and practice social skills.

How long does social skills training take?
Changing social behavior takes time. Most groups meet for one hour one time a week for several months. Children learn specific skills each week and then have a chance to practice the skills between sessions.

Are parents involved in the social skills training?
Parents definitely need to know what the children are being taught in group so they can reinforce positive changes in the child’s behavior. Monthly parent meetings are ideal to review training techniques and get feedback on progress and problems at home and school.

How much does social skills training cost?
Group therapy is typically about one half the cost of individual therapy. It is also much more realistic and effective than individual therapy to treat social interaction problems.

Where can I go to get help for my child?
Call your school counselor or ask your family doctor for the counseling center nearest you that does social skills training.

Dr. Susan Istre, LPC has been in a private counseling practice in Dallas for over 12 years. She is currently the Director of the Center For Social Success, with offices in Dallas, Plano, and the Shelton School. Dr. Istre and her ten staff therapists provide a broad range of services to children, adolescents, and adults. For more information, see her website at www.dristre.com or call 972-404-3001.